It was just one little lie, what’s the big deal. It’s just a little white lie. I have heard this more than once during a counseling session and even in everyday conversations. If I’m being honest, I’ve said this myself. We may even justify our lies by claiming we didn’t want to hurt the individual we were lying to. That sounds reasonable, right? If it is done in order to protect someone then why not, it’s the compassionate thing to do, right? Wrong.
Some truths I’ve learned about lies:
One lie leads to other lies. Once you’ve told the little white lie you must continue to lie in order to maintain it. Before you know it, you are trapped in a web of lies and your little lie is now a big mess of lies and deception.
Lies produce guilt and shame (for believers). Before giving my life to Christ I lied without thinking twice about it. It came naturally. Once I gave my life to Jesus and He saved me I have a very different experience when I lie. I will never forget a time when I told a little white lie (out of fear) and my whole world was turned upside down and no one knew it but me. I became an emotional wreck. Not only was I effected emotionally with guilt and shame, but I became physically sick to my stomach, I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep, and I felt tremendous guilt. It wasn’t until I reached out to the person I lied to and confessed I lied before that weight was lifted from me.
Lies destroy trust. Unlike respect, trust is something that must be earned. Once we break that trust by lying, we prevent connection and our motives and intentions become questionable. Think of your own experiences, how likely are you to trust someone you know has lied to you? Even if you have forgiven them, you are aware of their ability to lie to you.
When we lie to each other we are doing Satan’s work for him (Nancy Leigh Demoss). Satan is the author of lies. He is the first recorded liar in history. The thing is his deception is so subtle it is easy to believe. Have you ever met a good liar; someone that was able to convince you to believe them, only later to feel foolish for doing so? We all have the capacity to deceive, especially when we are fearful. In the words of my four year old son, don’t let the devil use you.
Healing comes through exposing the lies (James 5:16) “Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” The darkness can not exist in the light. We as Christians possess a light within us that overcomes the darkness. Speak truth at all times. Even when we are fearful, when it comes with painful consequences, when oppressed, or when we feel incompetent. Speak the truth.
The truth leads to freedom (the truth will set you free). Be authentic, be vulnerable, connect with those that mean the most to you. Don’t allow the fear of being exposed as a failure, incompetent, incapable, or less than prevent you from doing the hard right thing.
The hard thing is always the right thing and you can do hard things. Trust the Christ that is in you.